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With Owens Suspended, Others Should Give Thanks

By Yong-yi Zhu

With Thanksgiving coming up soon, I would like to take the time to send out some thank you notes to teams around the NFL. This time, they are directed at Terrell Owens, the wide receiver who was recently suspended by the Philadelphia Eagles after an interview in which he criticized the Eagles for not recognizing his accomplishments. He also has complained all season long about a contract renegotiation one year into a long-term contract. Here are some sample letters that I found. As you can see, Owens has affected many people this year.

Dear Terrell Owens,

Thank you for making me look like an absolute hero. Right now, my Giants are on top of the NFC East and loving every minute of it. With the Eagles not in the forefront of the playoff picture, I can lead my Giants to the NFC East Divisional lead. Had you been there, the Giants would not be at the top of the division, and I would not be nearly as big of a story as I am now.


Eli Manning

Dear Terrell Owens,

Thank you for making the NFC East a happy division to play in. We all thought coming into the season that the Eagles were going to run away with the division. Everyone felt as though second place and a wild card spot would be the only reasonable goal for us. However, now that you have been suspended by the Eagles, we are all blessed with newfound hope for winning the NFC East. On top of that, we look like a respectable division once again.

Yours truly,

The Washington Redskins, the New York Giants and the Dallas Cowboys

Dear Terrell Owens,

Thank you for leaving us before causing a real ruckus in San Francisco. We thought that your problems with Jeff Garcia would be the end of this organization. True, we did take a major step backwards after you left, but I think overall, we are a better ball club without you. We appreciate the fact that we parted ways, or else we might be in the difficult contract situation that Philadelphia is in right now.

Best of luck,

The San Francisco 49ers

Dear Terrell Owens,

Thank you for not joining the Ravens. Had you come to this team, we would be the laughingstock of the NFL right now. Thanks for whining to the NFL and getting yourself routed to the Philadelphia Eagles instead. At the time, I might have thought that it was a terrible situation for us. However, I have since understood that you just did not want to make the Baltimore Ravens a circus team. We appreciate your consideration.

Your former friend,

Ray Lewis

Dear Terrell Owens,

Thank you for taking the Eagles out of contention in the playoff picture. I don’t know if they will be contenders for the Super Bowl still, but our chances of going to the big game just got a lot better now that you are suspended from Philadelphia. With the Eagles struggling, we are the two teams who have the best shot at making it to the NFC Championship game. Had you not destroyed the psyche of the Eagles, we would still be second class contenders, but our records right now look great getting ready for the playoff run.

Thanks again,

The Carolina Panthers and the Atlanta Falcons

Dear Terrell Owens,

Thank you for taking all the heat off of us for being complete underachievers. Our teams have had major injuries, and as a result, you see the Chicago Bears sitting happily on top of our division. True, this is an utter disappointment, considering that we were both playoff teams from a year ago. We are trying our hardest to dig ourselves out of this hole, but the decreased media attention really helps to take the pressure off of us. Any other year, and we would be the laughingstock of the NFL, but this is a special year, all thanks to you.

Your colleagues,

Brett Favre and Daunte Culpepper