The Tech - Online EditionMIT's oldest and largest
newspaper & the first
newspaper published
on the web
Boston Weather: 38.0°F | A Few Clouds

Ask Arista is an advice column written anonymously by an MIT undergraduate. The views expressed in this column do not necessarily represent those of The Tech.

Ask Arista is an advice column written anonymously by an MIT undergraduate. The views expressed in this column do not necessarily represent those of The Tech.

Dear Arista,

I’m a junior girl, and I am attracted to a freshman guy. Is it socially acceptable for me to ask him out?

--Anonymous

Dear Anonymous,

Absolutely, ask him out! A lot of guys find women who take initiative very attractive, and being slightly older and more experienced will only work to your advantage. Besides, freshmen are fun to hang out with. The Institute hasn’t crushed their spirits or sapped away their youthful energy. And his being on Pass/No Record means he will have plenty of time to spend with you. Don’t worry about what others will think, either. Once they see how your malleable young catch scrambles at your every beck and call, they will realize that you knew what you were doing all along. Good luck!

--Arista K.

Dear Arista,

I want to pursue my extracurricular activities, but my semester is just getting increasingly busy and stressful. Should I cut back on my outside activities and focus on academics or try to keep some balance of work and fun?

--Frazzled Freshman

Dear Frazzled,

It is time you learned that MIT will eat up any and all the time you give to it. If you abandon the things that bring balance to your life, you will end up a sad, smelly wretch who lives in lab and subsists on pasta, cheese, and highly caffeinated sodas. And why live like a grad student when you don’t have to? Enjoy your hobbies, manage your time wisely, and most importantly, date an upperclassman who will do your homework for you. Peace.

--Arista K.

Dear Arista,

Is it just me, or are this year’s freshmen dumber and better looking?

--Anonymous

Dear Anonymous,

You should give yourself more credit. True, the freshmen may be better looking than you, but it is entirely possible that you are way dumber than they are.

--Arista K.

Do you have a question you’re dying to ask Arista? E-mail your question to <fea-submit@the-tech.mit.edu>, and it could appear in the next installment of “Ask Arista!”