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This Week on Home Video -- A Wry Look at Catch-22

By Holden Caulfield

If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you'll probably want to know is whether or not I liked this movie and all. While Ackley and Stradlater thought it was swell, I thought it was crumby. The movie wasn't as bad as some I've seen. It was on the crappy side, though.

it for you or anything. There isn't anything to spoil for chrissake. It ends up that Yossarian really does go crazy. After a friend of his escapes from the island and the Army, he gets up the courage to leave the base, or he runs off like a madman. Either way. All I can say is, don't see it if you don't want to puke all over yourself.

Catch-22 is pretty filled with Hollywood prostitutes. Stars are such a bunch of goddamn phonies. Bob Newhart, Charles Grodin, Martin Sheen, Norman Fell, Jon Voight and Buck Henry all make appearances, along with Anthony Perkins, Orson Wells and Art Garfunkel. Rarely has such an extensive group of phonies been assembled for one lousy picture. If you want to know the truth, the only human performance in the movie was turned in by Arsenio Hall, who played the barber with the right combination of allegorical cynicism and delicate, scathing wit. Some might think that director Mike Nichols' look at men under the hypocrisy of war is sensitive. That kills me. That guy Nichols is about as sensitive as a goddamn toilet seat.

Some of the guys I know said the book was way better than the movie. I never read the book. I don't have time for crap like that. What really knocks me out is a book that, when you're all done reading it, you wish the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it. That doesn't happen much, though. I wouldn't mind calling Isak Dinesen up. But Joseph Heller, I don't know. He just isn't the kind of guy I'd want to call up, that's all.

Holden Caulfield is a pseudonym for Glen Weinstein '92, Hank Sawtelle '93, and Jerome Salinger '93.