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Tech wisdow watch

With apologies to Newsweek, The Tech staff proudly presents its first (and last) Tech Wisdom (TW) watch. As President Paul E. Gray '54, "a plain-spoken electrical engineering specialist with the build and staying power of a fireplug," moves out of stately 111 Memorial Drive and Phillip A. Sharp prepares to assume the throne, the TW provides a recap of the key candidates in the search for the 15th president.

John Deutch '61

Provost, MIT

Z_Z_Old TW: War Provost perfect to keep funds flowing from the DOD old-boy network.

Z_Z_New TW: End of cold war signals time for a kinder, gentler president.

Lester Thurow

Dean, MIT Sloan

School of Management

Z_Z_Old TW: Mediagenic Sloan Dean would boost MIT's profile.

Z_Z_New TW: Moronic statements on fraternities show he's as bad as the rest.

George Shultz PhD '49

Former Secretary of State

Z_Z_Old TW: Tiger tattoo turns off nerds.

Z_Z_New TW: Why was he on the Globe's list in the first place?

David Baltimore '61

Director, Whitehead Institute

Z_Z_Old TW: Nobel laureate and Big Ed Whitehead integrated into University-Industrial Complex.

Z_Z_New TW: Dingell damage leads to exile at Rockefeller U.

Sheila Widnall '60

Professor, Department of

Aeronautics and Astronautics

Z_Z_Old TW: TW picked Aero-Astro God to be prez in 1988.

Z_Z_New TW: Old fuddy-duddy white males on selection committee would never choose a woman.

Donald Kennedy

President,

Stanford University

Z_Z_Old TW: Crimson alum, Cardinal prez. Red scare for hardliners on committee.

Z_Z_New TW: Too many Kennedys in Massachusetts already.

Arno A. Penzias

Head of Research,

AT&T Bell Laboratories

Z_Z_Old TW: Bell Labs' Nobel laureate the perfect candidate for the information age.

Z_Z_New TW: What do we need him for, we already replaced dormline.

Frank Press

President, National

Academy of Sciences

Z_Z_Old TW: Boring NAS head turned down last time around.

Z_Z_New TW: Nothing's changed.

Dean Eastman

Vice President

of Research, IBM

Z_Z_Old TW: Namesake of George, sentimental favorite of the over-80 crowd.

Z_Z_New TW: No relation. Sorry.

Thomas E. Everhart SIDEWAYS

California Institute of Applied Technology

Old TW: Caltech wannabe makes the Science list.

New TW: Never heard of Everhart.

Solomon J. Buchsbaum

PhD '57

Executive Vice President,

AT&T Bell Laboratories

Z_Z_Old TW: Another Bell Labs honcho, but with the vital corporate connections.

Z_Z_New TW: Corporate cold-warrior is Deutch in sheep's clothing.

James F. Gibbons

Dean of Engineering,

Stanford University

Z_Z_Old TW: Turned down CMU presidency for MIT.

Z_Z_New TW: Should have accepted the CMU offer.

Phillip A. Sharp

Director, MIT Center for

Cancer Research

Z_Z_Old TW: Lasker Award winner does good as Cancer Center head. A favorite of the faculty.

Z_Z_New TW: Faculty finally gets its way.

The Corporation and

faculty search

committees

Z_Z_Old TW: March 2 announcement allows Friday news break for crack staff at The Tech.

Z_Z_New TW: Early announcement preempts Tech scoop.