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Articles by Paul Woods

STAFF WRITER
January 11, 2012
I came up with the GOATs (Greatest of All Times) list decision-making process during my sophomore year at MIT. It quickly became my go-to guide for making tough life decisions. In the beginning, there were only three GOATs. Lady Gaga and Eminem were tier one, and Charlie Sheen was tier two. The GOATs process involved complex Bayesian analysis, but the basics of it were this: whenever I couldn’t decide what to do, I would ask myself, “What would Lady Gaga and Eminem do in this situation?” If they would do the same thing, I went with that. If there was no clear consensus, Charlie Sheen was the tiebreaker.
STAFF WRITER
September 27, 2011
They told him that it wouldn’t work. “When we went to conferences, they did not believe that complex digital circuits could reliably operate at low voltages.” Chandrakasan’s interest in circuits was sparked in his college years. When Chandrakasan was a senior at Berkeley, he began working with Professor Robert Brodersen, who became his thesis advisor.
STAFF COLUMNIST
June 10, 2011
As the sexy beast I am — chicks dig acne — it should be no surprise to anyone that I have had a number of lovers over the years. Here, I go through my past relationships and explain why they ended:
STAFF COLUMNIST
June 3, 2011
Reviewing my recent Tech pieces, I noticed that my columns have been very positive and upbeat. Trying to come up with a way to balance out all of this positivity, I remembered a video by ItsKingsleyBitch, one of my favorite vloggers, titled “Things I Hate.” It gave me an idea: I should write a “Things I Hate” column.
STAFF COLUMNIST
April 8, 2011
It all started when I was using StumbleUpon and came across a satire. It was modeled after an Alcoholics Anonymous pamphlet and began:
STAFF COLUMNIST
March 1, 2011
The walk to and from school everyday simply can’t be uphill both ways, which is why I don’t want to ever turn into a “back in the day” person. Fifteen years from now, when all media is streamed over the Internet and free from FCC regulation, I don’t want to be running around saying things like, “Remember back in the day, when we used to have artists like Ke$ha and Britney Spears? Those singers had class!” Unfortunately, not becoming a “back in the day person” is easier said than done. I know this because I caught myself unknowingly turning into one.
February 8, 2011
This semester, I switched from pencils to pens. I could never understand people who use pens. You can’t erase with pens — it’s like buying a keyboard without a backspace key.
February 1, 2011
Every once in a while, you run into someone who’s lived in a particular city for a long time and knows her way around. She call tell you the best local restaurants, the coolest clubs, and which places to avoid at all costs (the real-life equivalents of 4chan.org). I like to think of myself as that person — except for the Internet. So I might as well show everybody around. Here are ten good sites that you’ve probably never heard of:
January 19, 2011
I’m the Ash Ketchum of programming. I want to be the very best — which is why it pains me that I’m still nothing close to an elite coder. So when my parents bought me the new Sprint HTC Evo 4G last summer, I decided that I was going to write an Android app. I needed something fun to do while home for summer break, and becoming an Android developer would help further my progress toward the 10,000 hours of practice that Malcolm Gladwell insists I need to be really good at something.
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